Lawns grow plush in the hinterlands
   It's the perfect little setting for the one night stands
   Now the drapes are drawn and the lights are out
   It's the time to put in practice what you've dreamed about
  
   She can show you what you must do
   To be more like people better than you
  
   Amateur Hour goes on and on
   When you turn pro you know she'll lets you know
   Amateur Hour goes on and on
   When you turn pro you know
   She tells you so
  
   Girls grow tops to go topless in
   While we sit and count the hairs that blossom from our chins
   Our voices change at a rapid pace
   I could start a song a tenor and then end as bass
  
   Choose your partners everyone
   If you hesitate, the good ones are gone
  
   (Chorus)
  
   Dance, laugh, wine, dine, talk and sing
   But those cannot replace what is the real thing
   It's a lot like playing the violin
   You cannot start off to be Yehudi Menuhin