My misery has enjoyed company
  and although I have ached
  I don't threaten anybody
  sometimes I feel more bigness than I've shared with you
  sometimes I wonder why I quell when I'm not required to
  I've tried to be small I've tried to be stunted
  I've tried roadblocks and all
  my happy endings prevented
  sometimes I feel it's all just too big to be true
  I sabotage myself for fear of what my bigness could do
  fear of bliss and fear of joyitude
  fear of bigness (and ensuing solitude?)
  I could be golden I could be glowing I could be freedom
  but that could be boring
  sometimes I feel this is too scary to be true
  I sabotage myself for fear of losing you
  this talk of liberation makes me want to go lie down
  under the covers til the terror of the unknown is gone
  I could be full I could be thriving I could be shining
  sounds isolating
  sometimes I feel this is too good to be true
  I sabotage myself for fear of what my joy could do