Have you ever known a free lancer
  Thinks that he's a camper
  Known around my way as the cramper
  Like P.M.S. always pokin'
  But he won't go away with a little Motrin
  Now if u ever heard the term cramper and u wonder
  The worms kinda like i guess a modern day Felix Unger
  When ya first meet em ya think he's O.K.
  But then you learn a little bit of the cramper goes a long way
  Hear say here I say thru the grapevine
  He squawks and he gawks and he walks a thin line
  Just like a little fuckin fag
  He always wants to get high but never has a bag
  Never works says he can't find the right job
  Ain't got a dime and when he does he's a tightwad
  He's the dampest there's no one damp
  Huh huh.... he's the muther fuckin cramper
  Now the crampers red, there's no one redder,
  He rides ya wrong like a really tight sweater
  He's sorta like a mouse a pest of a peer
  U come home he's at your house drinkin your last beer
  Pokin and strokin he makes you wanna belt him
  always wearin out his mother fuckin welcome
  And then sporty's never that cautious
  he sips from your forty and he always backwashes
  Talk about a certain subject, he'll jinx it
  let him borrow a shirt, the stooge always shrinks it
  He's the dampest, there's no one damper
  Huh huh.... he's the mother fuckin cramper